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Howdy. I have a few things that I should be doing rather than sitting here, typing this. But, I kinda miss spilling my thoughts in here. It’s been quite some time since I took a step back from blogging. I don’t really know why I did, though. I guess because I’ve found new ways to spend my days.
I live alone. Kinda. Technically, not. I’m renting a room and living with the landlord and his niece. We rarely talk, let alone see each other. They’re both very quiet, which I’m totally fine with, in fact, my preference. The niece is my age but she likes to spend her time alone in her room. Even if we’re both in the house, we only get to say hi to each other when we’re both in the kitchen. And sometimes, we don’t.
I like it. I’m not exactly a people person. Although I try to reach out and make friends, I’m not very skilled in carrying conversations with people I barely know. I’m very off-limits and this lifestyle works for me.
I do video call my family all day, everyday. Unless, I’m at work. Or I’m out to meet some friends. Yes, I do go out once in a while. I have a few friends that I get to meet once or twice a year. Although, I mostly do the things I enjoy, alone. Like, go to the movies. Dine at my favourite restaurant. Or window shop.
More often than not, I find myself alone in a sea of people. I’m glad that I don’t feel lonely, though. And that’s a miracle. I could be wallowing in self-pity and depression, overwhelmed by loneliness. And I have. Oh, I very much, have. That’s where Jesus found me.
Jesus, Jesus, Jesus. He made all the difference.
Nowadays, I spend my time, watching movies at home, playing Eternium on my phone, updating my sister’s website and, dare I say it, clean my room, at least once in a while. I should start reading again. Maybe more nonfic than fanfic. Lol. Oh well, I couldn’t care less anymore.
Living life free from cares and worries is great. And I know that everyday, I’m growing, my perception is changing and I guess I’m starting to understand things that didn’t even exist, not so long ago, in my small world. And I like it. I like this peace. Maybe someday I’ll write more about how I arrived from there to here.
If there’s one thing I learned from following Jesus, other than everything else so far, it’s that, as long as I live in this world, I’ll never stay the same. It’s like, since I started walking with Him, only that fact remained a constant. Everything else just started falling into their places without my intervention (as if I could do something about anything) and they still do. It makes me feel lightweight. Like mountains of burden keep getting lifted up my shoulders. And it makes me, for some reason, patient with others. The truth is, things are changing for them too. What they are now is never a definition of who they really are, on the inside. As long as they are alive and breathing, things are bound to change.
The world is a funky place. But I haven’t seen the rest of it, so I may be wrong. All I know right now is that, life is cool.